As the searing Indian sun bore down on the ancient blue city of Jodhpur that morning, I sat pensively on the balcony, gazing over the city.
Beside me, my partner eagerly awaited our day’s adventure, her eyes fixed on the grand fort atop the hill.
We were early in our trip through Rajasthan – young, in love, surrounded by beauty…
But something was wrong.
It was me. I was exhausted.
For days I’d been feeling weary, lifeless…
And the thought of marching up that hill?
Felt like hell to me.
As the days turned into weeks, nothing was shifting.
I struggled to get out of bed each morning, and even the simplest tasks felt like insurmountable obstacles.
The fatigue was getting worse… And then something happened.
I began scouring the internet searching for answers. From YouTube videos, to online forums, to books on the subject - I found countless horror stories of people speaking about complex gut issues, auto-immune diseases and chronic exhaustion that lasted years on end…
The more I read, the more fear began to grow.
I started to wonder…
What if something was seriously wrong?
What if I never get my energy back?
What if my life, as I knew it, was done.
By now the anxiety had turned into a giant gaping hole of dread that took permanent hold in my stomach.
A month or so later I was traveling on a bus in Northern Thailand, slumped into the corner of my seat, scrolling through my phone, when I stumbled upon a podcast featuring a man named Paul Chek.
As I listened to him, he began to speak about something that was both simple, yet utterly profound to me at that moment.
Paul introduced what he called “The Overarching Dream” - meaning? - A man needs something to strive for, something to aim at, something that gives your life purpose and meaning.
There I was traveling the world, like I’d done for almost a decade…
All the while never really knowing what I wanted or where I was going. I’d been accumulating knowledge, ‘working on myself’...
Studying philosophy, doing yoga, taking courses,
I’d been to kung-fu temples in China,
I’d taken Ayahuasca,
I’d read countless books on everything from tantra to flow,
I’d even sat in silence for 10 days straight in meditation.
Yet there I was selling silly pieces of jewelry to people on the internet to make a little cash to keep my lifestyle going…
As I reflected on my life, I came to the harsh realization that I had been going in circles…accumulating knowledge, then doing nothing with it…rinsing, repeating and so on…
In that moment, I came to the stark conclusion that I had genuinely lost my way.
I felt a deep sadness and shame wash over me as I reflected on how small a life I was living, how much I was hiding and holding myself back.
The truth stings they say, I remember that one like it was yesterday.
Then, later that day, something else began to stir within me - it was an old memory from an Ayahuasca journey I’d taken many years before…
And for some reason, it was beginning to resurface...
Something monumental had taken place that night deep in Peruvian jungle,
The visions & realizations were so powerful, the information was so overwhelming…
That It shook me to my very core.
I wasn’t ready to see what I saw.
And when I sobered up, although I was aware that something profound had happened… I couldn’t remember it.
I couldn’t bring the insights back into this world…
And as the years went on, the subtle remnants of the experience had faded into a distant memory somewhere in the recesses of my mind…
In other words, I buried it… And up until now, I’d forgotten all about it…
Yet here I was, years later and all of a sudden it was hitting me again like a tonne of bricks…
I could feel it…
What had taken place that night,
Images and memories began to strike me one by one.
I sensed again what it was all about…
Something about a task… Some ‘work’ to be done here in this lifetime…
As if some ‘thing’ was calling me forwards…
It had magnitude…
And an heir of ‘utter importance’
And the scariest part?
It was much bigger than me and my life.
As I stood there, struck with awe, I still wasn't sure what exactly this meant…
But I knew deep in my heart that this memory was resurfacing now for a reason.
I knew there was a decision I was going to have to make…
Last time I’d denied the call…
But this time was different,
And I wasn’t going to ignore this anymore…
Over the next few days, I began to consider something I’d been thinking about for years;
Being a coach.
For as long as I could remember I’d always wanted to help people…
I’d been a natural teacher since I was young, I’d spent many years coaching kids soccer…
And while I’d more or less let that life go, still many friends often looked to me for advice over the years…
And I loved being there in the pocket with them, sharing perspectives, insights, and helping them figure sh*t out…
But when it came to taking coaching seriously as a profession, I’d always told myself “I’m not ready yet” - “One day, when I’ve got everything figured out, I’ll get to it”…
(Classic imposter syndrome!)
By now, more thoughts had begun to swirl…
I started putting two and two together…
What if…. I thought to myself… What if THIS is what my fatigue is really about?
What if this is actually NOT a health issue?
What if life is trying to teach me a lesson here?
What if this ‘fatigue’ is but a wake up call to smack me across the face…
And get me in touch with my life’s true purpose…
It was all starting to click now.
How perfect this was…
The ‘wake-up call’ I needed...
To get me to DO THE WORK I was meant to do in this world…
Before I knew it that gaping hole of dread in my stomach had transformed into a nervous anticipation…
New beginnings were in the air…
And with a sense of adventure brimming through my veins… I sat by the river in a little village in Northern Thailand…
Then and there, I made the decision to become a coach.
And although I had no idea ‘how’ I was going to do it…
Come hell or high water… I was going to make this fvckn thing happen! Over the next few months all I thought about, talked about and read about was coaching…
I was obsessed.
Each day I sat in meditation, visualizing and feeling the thing I wanted it…Every day the vision was the same - I was either on a stage or working with a group of people facilitating deep, cathartic, personal transformation.
The power of the vision was equally as exciting as it was terrifying.
How far could I go?
Not before long, more help appeared…
People kept popping up at ‘just the right time’...
Then, Joseph Campbell and The Hero's Journey came into my life…
And man oh man did I resonate…
This was all starting to make PERFECT sense…
And the coolest part of all this?
Well, through that process of learning, creating and summoning this ‘thing’ into being…
I’d been so excited to get up and work each day that I’d more or less forgotten about my fatigue…
I was like a blazing inferno, driving forward no matter what…
And day by day, my fatigue began to fall away…
Until one day I realized…
It was completely gone.
Three months after making that decision to become a coach, my business was up and running and I already had my first few clients…
Soon after - The Modern Warrior was born.
I created a short guide called ‘Way of The Modern Warrior”, put it out online and bang!
Thousands of people downloaded it…
And before I knew it my calendar was loaded.
Men came flooding in from all parts of the world…
And before my very eyes a tribe grew around me…
Dozens of men on their own missions…ready to take on the world too…
It was nothing short of an honor…
And the results that commenced were nothing short of spectacular.
In my first year as a coach I made more income than I’d ever made in my life.
And five years on - I now run a multiple 7 figure education business that continues to serve tens of thousands of people across the world…
Today my days are fun, exciting, creative…
I get inspiring messages from people every day thanking me for the impact I’ve made in their lives…
Honestly I get taken back by it.
The gratitude is difficult to put into words.
It pushes me forward… To keep creating… To keep bringing value into this world, from all that I’ve learned, and from all I’ve been through…
What I know now is that it all happened for a reason…
Through breaking down I found what I needed to break through…
The vision I created gave me droves of energy and momentum…
The deep sense of purpose gave my life meaning…
And the thrill of building a business got me focused and excited like never before…
When I look back now I know that my purpose was there all along, it just was waiting for me to yes to, and to finally invoke it!
And I want to say this to you:
Whether you’ve already stepped into your life’s purpose, or whether your path is still waiting for you to step on it…
You too are here for a reason.
You too have a unique purpose to live out on this earth…
And if you feel something when I say that to you?
Then you can be damn sure that you’ve got some work to do too.
A new story waiting to be told,
An epic process about to unfold,
But the path not easy for old habits die slow,
For the king to rule he must overthrow,
Old stories, old patterns, old beliefs must go,
For the new to rise, he must die to the old,
But spring only comes after winter's snow,
The hidden treasure buried deep, deep down below,
Through trials, tribulations and nights of cold,
You'll find ally's and hands to hold,
There is much that awaits you in the great unknown,
And the darkest of dark, you must walk through alone,
When all is but lost, and you're withered to the bone
You begin listen to the whispers and moans,
Subtle voices guide, a way you are shone,
They point to fire, only it can melt stone
Scorched by the heat you begin to let go,
The fear begins to soften, the love begins to glow
A broken heart begins to re-sow,
What was once dark matter, has now become gold.
When spring does return with new winds blown,
You'll come to see how much you've grown,
New stories, new gifts, new wisdom to bestow,
Now the path becomes clear and it points you back home
For you walked through valley and the shadows of old,
You look back with a smile for you've finally let go.